thoughts from the hospital

second post of the day

I've noticed that my hair is changing back to the way it was...before getting pregnant. And this reminded me of the first time I brushed my hair after giving birth. It was late at night and I knew my hair looked horrible, I could feel it. It felt horrible. So I attempted to brush it, washing it was out of the question since I couldn't walk yet. I wasn't allowed, but physically....I couldn't walk. Anywho, I was getting ready for bed and I tried running a brush through my hair. Nevermind all the knots and tangles....my hair was falling out!! It was all over the bed and my pillow and my clothes. I was freaking out. One doctor comes in to talk to me and before he says anything, I look at him with this horrified look on my face and ask him with handfuls of hair if this was normal. He gave me a kind of worried look and told me that he is the pediatrician. I felt kind of stupid. I never got my answer by the way. Luckily I didn't go bald or even lose enough hair to notice, but it really scared me.

Back to the no walking deal. They gave me enough drugs that I couldn't feel anything from my belly button down. I couldn't even move my left leg at all. It kept plopping off the bed at times before it was time to push. By the time it was time to push, I couldn't feel either leg and they decided to turn off my epidural. Anyway... pushing didn't work, I was too tired. I'm sure I've mentioned this. As soon as they said I needed a C-section I burst out in tears. I didn't want one. I felt like I had failed. Other than feeling them halfway through, the surgery went ok. So I wasn't allowed to walk, at all, until the following morning. It was even difficult for me to situate myself in bed. I couldn't feel the lower half of my body and I was worried about my cut and staples. By bedtime I could feel my legs like normal, but was still in pain.

In the morning a nurse came in to help me walk to the bathroom. Standing up was the hardest thing. It took me a good 10 minutes just to get steady enough to stand there, with the nurse and hubby holding on to me. Then, another 5 minutes to walk to the bathroom and another 5 to get back to bed. After that first time, it got easier with each try. But wow, I can't believe how difficult it was that first time. I don't remember going through that with Lilly. I don't know if it was due to the C-section or what. Within a few hours I was walking by myself with just a little difficulty. I didn't walk normal until a week later when they took my staples out. I can't believe what a difference that made.

It was super nice to always have someone there with me too. Hubby got to stay with me the entire time, he slept in the other bed in the room cuz no one else was there. When we went home to get a shower and stuff, his sister and mom was there. When I had Lilly, I was mostly there by myself. My mom came and went and visitors came and went....but I was mostly alone. My oldest brother was a security guard at that time at that hospital and he kept bringing me fruit bowls.

Just some more thoughts from the hospital I wanted to share.