Thursday, July 29, 2010

Happiness....and a side note

My grandpa sent me an email yesterday.... I will share it with you.

We convince ourselves that life will be better after we get married. Then we convince ourselves that we'll be happy after we have a baby. Then we'll find happiness when we have another baby.
Then we are frustrated that the kids aren't old enough and we are sure we will be more content when they are. After that, we are frustrated that we have teenagers to deal with. We will certainly be happy when they are out of THAT stage.
We tell ourselves that our life will be complete when our spouse gets his or her act together, when we get a nicer car, are able to go on a nice vacation, when we retire.
The truth is, there is no better time to be happy than right now. If not now, then when? Your life will always be filled with challenges. It is best to admit this to yourself and decide to be happy anyway.
There is a famous quote from Alfred D Souza: "For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin - real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gottenthrough first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, or a debt to be paid. Then life would surely begin. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles WERE my life".
There is no way TO happiness. Happiness IS the way. So, treasure every moment that you have and treasure it more because you shared it with someone special, special enough to spend your time...and remember that time waits for no one.
So, stop waiting until you finish school, until you go back to school, until you lose ten pounds, until you gain ten pounds, until you have kids, until your kids leave the house, until you start work, until you retire, until you get married, until you get divorced, until Friday night, until Sunday morning, until you get a new car or home, until your car or home is paid off, until spring, until summer, until fall, until winter, until you are off welfare, until the first or fifteenth, until your song comes on, until you have had a drink, until you have sobered up, until you die, until you are born decide that there is no better time than right now to be happy.

Work like you don't need money,
Love like you've never been hurt,
And dance like no one's watching.
Happiness is a journey, not a destination

I'm going to think about this every time I start feeling down. I also saw that guy that I work with that got hit by a van while riding his motorcycle (I know I posted the story from the newspaper and some pics, but I can't quite remember the date...I think in April or May) and it did make me realize that no matter how bad of a day I am could always be worse. He is doing good though. He has his prosthetic foot on and is walking without any crutches now. With everything that has happened to him (getting hit, losing his foot), he has always been smiling through the whole thing. He is my inspiration. It seems like nothing can bring him down. Whenever anyone would call or visit him, or when he would visit us here, he was always in a good mood and chipper. Thanks Jimmy!! Your positive attitude is very contagious. Its one thing to read about good things and good people, but to see and experience it is another. I hope I will turn into someone like Jimmy.
On a not so positive side note..... been having problems with Lillys father. School starts on August 20 and we live in separate school districts. As the parenting plan is set now, he gets her Thursdays and brings her back on Sundays. Obviously things need changed, but he is so against going back to court. He wants to work it out by ourselves, but I was stupid enough to try that once and he changed his mind on everything all of a from now on I want everything in writing, signed by a judge and filed in the court systems. She can't miss Fridays. I want her back earlier on Sundays so I have more time to bathe, feed, spend time with her and do homework if she has any. Kindergarten....I don't know if they will have homework and if they do I doubt it will take more than 5 minutes. But right now he brings her back at 6. Her bedtime is at 8. We meet in the middle, between our houses. It takes me 30 minutes to get back home. So from 6:30 to 8, I'm trying to rush things to get them done with her and it makes us both frazzled. I want it changed where I get her back at 4 or 430. That would give me a little bit more time and we wouldn't have to rush things. I also can't have a weekend with her unless I ask permission from him first, I want that changed. I want her one weekend a month. Holidays can stay the same, that's fine. My time with her is very limited. I don't see my family unless I have Lilly....and I never have her, so we never see my family. I haven't seen my mom since mid June. Time is suppose to be split, but technically I don't see her on Thursdays. I drop her off to camp/school early in the morning and that's the last time I'll see her until Sunday. He said the only reason he doesn't want to go is ..... just because he doesn't want to go. He thinks we can do this ourselves..... I don't. I'm sorry, but I just don't have that much faith in his decision making and compromise. Get over it buddy. We're going back to court whether you like it or not. Oh and child support will even go down cuz she probably won't be in any kind of care. If she is, it will be dramatically lower than what I pay now. Child support will drop. That will help him out, but apparently he doesn't care. I was trying to be nice. That was one of the first things I told him, that the support will drop. Sorry.... no more nice. He already messed that up.

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