Ok, I thought I'd leave up Zach's pictures as the main post for a while. I'm pretty sure that as the days go by, things will pop into my head that I'm gonna wanna share about my hospital stay and my maternity leave. I apologize for my inconsistencies. I'll share them by bits and pieces as I remember them.
I had to take a sick leave yesterday cuz a I thought that Zach might have RSV. I called the doctor, but he doesn't seem too concerned just yet. There are 2 confirmed cases in the nursery at the Y, so I'm still worried even thought the doc told me not to be. Although it might just be a cold or his sinuses or something. He can't breathe very well, but he's fine after he coughs up some grossness I'm assuming is mucous. If I can get him to spit it out, he's fine, but if he swallows it, he gets worse. He sounds like a piggy when he breathes. Doc said don't worry until he's running a fever, loses his appetite, or isn't very active anymore. I'm still gonna worry.
Over my maternity leave, Lilly was sick 3 times. First she had a staph infection on her face. Then, she had pink eye, then she had this gross chest cold where she was running a fever, couldn't breathe and coughing her head off.
She's very jealous of the baby, but in a weird way. She doesn't want alone time with me, but she does. She wants time with me, but with Zach there, but I can't be doing anything with him, only her. She got mad at me while she was sick cuz I had to keep leaving her to go feed him or change him and she was wanting to be babied. Then she got mad at me yesterday cuz I was so worried over Zach and wouldn't leave his side cuz I was afraid he's stop breathing. She said, "When I was sick you kept leaving me to be with him, but you won't leave him to be with me." I told her I was sorry, but Zach cannot take care of himself like she can; he can't feed himself or take himself to the bathroom and he needs some play time. She didn't care. The one time we tried to just have mommy time, hubby took Zach to his moms and me and Lilly was free to do whatever we wanted, but for an hour she moped and cried cuz Zach wasn't there with us.
I REALLY REALLY want to pre-order The Book of Even More Awesome but I just can't right now and its killing me. I have opted into my work's health plan and I have more day care expenses. My paychecks look like crap. I'm just gonna have to wait, I guess, and tell someone that's what I want for my birthday in June. I don't think I can wait that long. It comes out next month and I hate that I don't have a copy reserved yet. I'm paying $320 A PAYCHECK for health insurance, and day care is $740 a month. Good news is that I have a raise coming up....bad news is that its only $0.24 extra an hour. My boss said that her new boss doesn't like what I'm being paid and they are gonna try to figure out a way to give me a sort of promotion to give me a good raise. She also told me that he's interested in sending me to school to get my degree in banking or something of the sort and then send me off to trust school as early as next year!! She has confidence that I will be able to take over her position in 8 years when she retires and her new boss agrees. I'm glad she has that much faith in me...cuz I sure don't. I had it in my head that I was gonna look for another job in about a year, but if these changes are made, I'm staying. I like this job cuz I have room to climb the ladder and will be head of a department in 8 years, my time is flexible (if somethings wrong with the kids and I can just go, no questions asked), and its a secure job. The only problems are, the pay sucks, some of the people suck, and I don't feel like its meaningful. Yeah, someone's gotta do the job, but I just feel like I was meant to do something more meaningful in my life other than to 'play' with rich people's money (while I'm making nothing). I am a volunteer for Relay for Life, so that's meaningful. My kids bring bunches of meaning to my life, but I just figured that what I would end up doing the rest of my life for a career would be something better..... something great....something to be proud of.
Oh, so..... I guess I gotta get back to work now. Its hard getting back into the groove of things. grrrr....I just balanced my checkbook...... its not looking good. Hopefully things will get better. I keep telling hubby that there is no way we can afford a house right now, but he won't listen. I'm gonna make him choose....house or health insurance.
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